Red carpet no-nos....

I love looking at red carpet photos. Celebrities usually look so polished, so well put together, so pretty...

...unless that celebrity happens to be Courtney Love and then she looks like a used Vegas cocktail lounge waitress...



...with massive amounts of collagen in her lips.

Then there's this laughable ensemble worn by Penelope Cruz who I seriously dislike but will admit is usually quite pretty.



This picture brings back memories. I'm reminded of family dinners back in Miami at a little restaurant on Calle Ocho called Casa Juancho. Oh yes. Casa Juancho. The kind of Spanish-themed restaurant that had large slabs of meat hanging as decoration. Penny looks an awful lot like the waiters there.



The frizzy hair and smeared eye make-up...so authentic! As if she was slaving away over a hot stove (or "orno" as the Spanish call it) all day. I detect a waiter theme in this post!

You heard it here first, folks. Dressing like your favorite waiter is the next thing. Get on it.