Good god...ouch.

So, I'm not a huge fan of Kelis' wardrobe choices but all in all I suppose this isn't terrible. The color is actually very pretty on her. It's no secret that I hate "tarzan straps" but hey, she can rock it, I suppose. In the grand scheme of things she looks young and fun and more or less put together...



...and then you zoom in.



Aaaak! Okay, not to be a total prude but the very thought of stabbing my nipple with a metal ring makes me gag and black out briefly. For the life of me I can't understand why people would want to pierce THAT. Not to mention piercings in your bits and pieces. OH MY GOD. I CAN'T EVEN THINK IT WITHOUT GETTING THE HEEBIE JEEBIES.

And yes, I know all about the alleged benefits. And I don't care. Because I would never been able to relax enough to enjoy it. I would be thinking horrible thoughts about freakish piercing accidents. Oh my god, I'm squeezing my legs together and cringing at the very thought.

I need to stop. Think happy thoughts, think happy thoughts.