Oh, baby!

Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt had their baby. The name? Shiloh Nouvel.

Hey, celebrities! Your children have to go through life with these names. Okay, okay…I get it. You want them to be unique and you think because they’re a celebrity-child that people will somehow think it’s okay that they’re named after fruit or poodles. But it’s not. Really. Not one bit.

I’m sure you’ve heard of most of these but I thought I’d highlight some of my favorite celebrity-baby names.

BABIES WITH NAMES THAT ARE ONLY OKAY FOR A POODLE OR OTHER SMALL LAP DOG:
- Rachel Griffiths – Banjo (there was a farmer had a dog and Banjo was his name, oh. B-A-N-J-O, B-A-N-J-O, B-A-N-J-O and Banjo was his name, oh)
- Courtney Cox – Coco (shimmy, shimmy coco puff. shimmy, shimmy, rock.)
- Bob Geldof (the guy who produced Band-Aid) - Peaches Honeyblossom, Fifi Trixibelle, Pixie (I have no words. Would you be able to take someone seriously with a name like Fifi?)
- Robert Rodriguez - Racer, Rebel and Rocket (alliteration aside, WTF?)
- Jamie Oliver (the “Naked Chef”) – Daisy Boo (Is the "Boo" because it's such a scary name?)
Tom Hanks – Truman and Chester (my dog’s name is Truman and Chester reminds me of Chester Cheetah. Enough said.)

BABIES WITH NAMES THAT ARE ONLY COOL FOR AN INDIE ROCK BAND:
- Jason Lee - Pilot Inspektor (Maybe he was conceived during a rerun of “Wings?”)
- Shannyn Sossamon (who is apparently some actress/DJ) – Audio Science (yeah, I've got nothing.)
- Penn Jillette (of Penn & Teller) – Moxie Crimefighter (No, seriously. That’s what he named his kid. No, for real.)

BABIES WITH NAMES THAT WOULD BE OKAY FOR A BEER:
- Casey Affleck (Ben’s brother) - Indiana August
- Mel C (from the Spice Girls) - Phoenix Chi (actually, this sounds more like something you'd get at Starbucks)

BABIES WITH NAMES THAT WILL DRIVE THEM TO BECOME PORN STARS:
- Michael Hutchence (former INXS front man) – Heavenly Hirani Tigerlilly
- Christie Brinkley – Sailor Lee
- Gwyneth Paltrow – Apple

BABY NAMES THAT DEFY EXPLINATION:
- Gillian Anderson – Piper Maru
- Michael J. Fox - Aquinnah Kathleen, Schuyler Frances (His son’s name is Sam. What kind of misogynistic bastard is MJF that he’d give his daughters such vile names?)
- Richard Gere – Jigme (Jigga, WHAT?)
- Nicholas Cage – Kal-el (Wasn't this Superman's "real" name?)