Sexy is in the eye of the beholder...

Things that are sexy:
1. Bikinis.
2. Cargo shorts - I don't know why, they just are.
3. A good tan.
4. Healthy, glowing skin.
5. Jorge Clooney.

Things that are NOT sexy:
1. This outfit:

Here's the thing. As "stand alone" items, these pieces aren't bad - it's the hideous combination that gets me. The unflattering way that gynormous belt sits on the largest part of her body, the fact that I absolutely hate those horrific "muffin top" pants, and the fact that I'm pretty sure women over 50 should stay away from materials that are more than 75% spandex.

I took this photo at my friend's baby shower. I'm sure it's an aunt or some other close relative. But even though I might be risking losing my friend's trust, I am duty bound to report on these types of fashion violations. I must save others from falling into the same trap. I am a giver, after all.